Even the title of this is ambitious. For context, I’m almost 39 and I have two daughters.

In the last year I’ve bought six new video games. They were: Street Fighter 6, Starfield, Demon Slayer Kimetsu No Yaiba, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Cowabunga Collection, Cyberpunk 2077 and Super Monkey Ball Banana Mania.

In the last year, I have played two video games. One of these was one game from the Cowabunga Collection, a Turtles game from the NES era that I never managed to complete as a child, which gave me an instant nostalgia hit and supreme levels of joy and frustration. The second was Mario Kart 8 at the arcade in the local bowling alley. My entire involvement was to hold the pedal down for my daughter as she over-steered Peach around the first course in the Mushroom Cup.

Am I bitter about this? Absolutely not. I love that I’m so busy with my daughters that I don’t have time to indulge this most selfish of hobbies. They are literally my world and I’d do anything for them. That my gaming interests have fallen by the wayside is just a tiny problem.

So why am I writing a blog post about it? Well, it’s fairly obvious isn’t it? I knew I was never going to play any of those games. So why on earth did I buy them? I guarantee that I will never reach the 5% point of Starfield. I may never even start Cyberpunk 2077. I’m a disgrace to planning, to the gaming industry and to my bank account.

Will I still buy the Turtles DLC for Street Fighter 6? Absolutely.